Are you freaking kidding me? You know, I've about had it with people these days! Honestly, the audacity of some folk. Who do they think they are, running gentlemen over, not opening doors, and reading some kids terrible blog? Get real.
In any case, I know that my last post was too long ago, and that is rude to keep my fools, I mean readers, waiting, so in honor of my ignorance I have decided to give a rant on bad manners. (In short, things I've seen that irk me.) Let's begin, shall we?
-First off, self-rightousness in public avenues. This includes (but is not limited to): hallways, sidewalks, DMV wait lines, and road traffic. In the last week, I have been hit forcefully with the shoulders of two (non)gentlemen at my establishment of education. Mind you, I understand that hallways between classes can be crowded, but both of these cheese sticks were looking right at me, then decided apparently that I was not worth moving out of the way for. After all, I was in THEIR way, right? Wrong! I don't care who you think you are, if you are walking straight at a person who is trying but cannot move politely out of your bull-headed way, then please take your rather bony shoulder and simply turn it to the left or right to avoid hitting said person and declaring yourself a pompous jerk.
-Next, language useage anywhere but by yourself. Now, I am a teenager myself. I know that occasionally an inappropriate word from our language may slip from your conciousness into reality (or in some cases is called for re:See above passage on cheese sticks). I myself have never made this mistake, for I am in fact the flawless seraphim that my grandparents believe me to be, but for those of you who have sought to make your life's goal to defoul and pollute the (American) English vocabulary every time you exhale a breathe, I have words for you. The great atomic 'F' bomb is not necessary, prior to popular belief, for response to any little thing you deem necessary (aka, insulting a fellow homo sapien, your general confusion, or inappropriate innuendos). And the many terms beginning with the letter 'S' that happen to be four letters? I would rather you just spoke them, you know, quietly if AT ALL. Please don't think I am being ignorant, or hypocritic, I too (don't) abuse the language collective on occasion, but this is addressed to any immature beings (Freshmen, local drivers, unemployed teenagers in front of gas stations...) who have no respect for who hears whatever they want to say.
-And finally.. Bodily. Functions. Must. Be. Kept. Silent. I do not ever want to hear (and smell) anything you have eaten in the last twelve hours. In full integrity, you sound like a hippopotamus. With a bad digestive system. I shall say no more, save for the next time you feel the urge to expell air-based obscenities from your person, please run as far from civilization to do so. Thank you.
And that has been your saving grace from the (least) most worthy giver of advice to the most (foolish) intelligent readers of this (god-awful) fantastic blog (yeah...if you can call it a blog, no?).
Remember, desperately avoid animal droppings in public parks, don't park just beyond the crest of a hill, and the 10 items or less signs at stores are really just suggestions, use them anyway.
With the least respect I can muster,
CWH
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